7 Ways to Protect Your Mental Health During Thanksgiving This Year
How to manage physically distanced celebrations, pandemic stress, and those dreaded political conversations.
Right now, the US is still reeling from a highly contested election, experiencing a concerning surge in coronavirus cases, and retightening physical distancing restrictions in several cities and states -- oh yeah, and Thanksgiving is right around the corner. Of course, it’s hard to think about the upcoming turkey day when we’ve already got a lot on our plates right now (pun definitely intended).
Just like everything else in 2020, Thanksgiving is probably going to look a little different this year, due largely to the necessary measures for keeping everyone healthy and safe amid the pandemic. Here are 7 stressful issues you may encounter this holiday season, and how to overcome them.
(Through everything this year has thrown at us, you have the power to support your friends’ mental and emotional health. Share your tips on coping with stress to be added to a national crowdsourced anti-stress guide and be entered to win a $1,000 scholarship.)
1) If you’re spending the holiday alone…
With everything going on, plenty of people will be opting to spend Thanksgiving solo this year (including a lot of college students), but keeping to yourself physically doesn’t have to mean isolating yourself socially too. If you still wanna get in on all the warm and fuzzy holiday festivities with family and friends, try going virtual (more on that below). It doesn’t have to be a full on remote party -- a quick FaceTime or call in the middle of the day can go a long way to feeling less lonely. At the same time, don’t let technology increase your FOMO either. Keep away from Instagram for the day if those family dinner pics will make you feel a little down.
There’s also plenty to do by yourself too! Don’t feel pressure to make your Thanksgiving feel exactly like any normal holiday. If it’s what feels right for you, skip the turkey and splurge on takeout, or spend the day in pajamas instead of your Thanksgiving best. Or ditch the festivities altogether and use your time off to volunteer in your community or online. Just do what makes you happy (you may even consider making a nice staycation out of it).
2) If you’re having a remote gathering…
We’ve already tackled remote work, classes, concerts, and award shows this year, so really we have virtual Thanksgiving in the bag. Folks are already putting together some really creative remote Thanksgiving ideas, including Zoom family photos, recipe swaps, and scavenger hunts. Don’t limit yourself to just a virtual dinner together! Try to find ways to remotely connect while cooking, decorating, or just hanging out. (And the best part is, you’ll only have to wash your own dishes at the end of the night.)
The important thing is to set realistic expectations for your holiday and to scale back where you need to. Remember that Zoom fatigue is a real thing, and your loved ones should understand if you need to take a step back from everything for a bit. This year has been strange in so many unexpected ways, so have patience with yourself and extend that patience to others too.
Share your tips on how to manage stress.
3) If you’re bummed about canceled traditions….
Maybe you’re not traveling to Grandma’s this year, or your annual Turkey Trot got canceled (if you’re one of those families who enjoys that kinda thing...). Thanksgiving is obviously going to look a little different for a lot of people this year, but there are still ways to incorporate traditions and some good ol’ nostalgia into the day. Get creative in adapting your traditions to our current COVID era -- gather your family for a virtual watch party of the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special, or have your grandma safely drop off some of her homemade pumpkin pie on your porch. After all, even the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade is giving their annual celebration a socially distanced twist.
This is also a great time to find a new tradition! Start a gratitude journal, decorate a cornucopia, or do something special for breakfast. Focus on the things you can control around you, and you’ll be happier for it.
4) If you’re stressed about the pandemic...
Our current health crisis is real, and it’s completely valid to be concerned about it. There are also plenty of steps you can take to protect yourself and your loved ones and make sure you have the safest celebration possible. First and foremost, read up on guidelines from the CDC on COVID-19 and the holidays, as well as from your local health department. Consider smaller gatherings, maintaining distance while together, and maybe even holding your celebration outdoors if you can. If you’re planning on traveling, know your travel risk, take measures to be as safe as possible, and understand when it may be necessary to delay a trip altogether.
Cut out the stuff from your festivities that’s unnecessarily risky -- like Black Friday shopping in person. (Plus, you can always scoop up some deals online instead, without the crowds and lines.) Don’t be afraid to set boundaries with your loved ones when it comes to your health and the health of others. If your family is hosting, make your expectations for things like mask wearing or hand washing clear, and if you’re joining someone else’s celebration, get an idea of what their plan is to keep folks safe. You can always politely decline if something makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe.
5) If you’re dreading the post-election political talk…
Election Day has come and gone and somehow this particularly stressful election season just doesn’t seem to end. This could make for some pretty tough convos around the dinner table (or Zoom call) this Thanksgiving, so feel prepared to navigate it with our guide to surviving political conversations with your family during the holidays. The big takeaways? Go in with a goal, really listen to one another, and recognize when it’s not worth your time or energy.
Also keep in mind that you don’t have to engage in any political discussions or arguments if you don’t want to. It isn’t your job to try and educate folks who only participate in bad faith or try to undermine or disrespect you. Call out harmful rhetoric when you see it, but if you wanna bury your head in the mashed potatoes instead of humoring a relative who’s upset about having to wear a face mask to the grocery store, then go for it.
6) If you’re stuck inside with family you’d rather avoid…
With so many places tightening up their physical distancing guidelines in light of the recent surge in cases, you may end up self-quarantined at home with family who you don’t necessarily get along with. If you’re a student at one of several schools ending their in-person instruction for the semester after Thanksgiving, you may even end up being stuck with them for much longer than expected.
For your Thanksgiving woes, check out our guide on how to survive the holidays with stressful family, and for more general conflicts that come up with your loved ones, you can learn how to confront and cope with family tension.
7) If you’re just feeling overwhelmed by it all…
We get it. There’s a lot going on right now for everyone. Thanksgiving may even feel like the least of your worries. While we obviously don’t have all of the answers, there are tons of resources out there to help you cope with whatever it is you’re going through. Here are a few:
- Thanksgiving & Gratitude During Hard Times
- The Empty Chair at the Holiday Table: Coping With Grief During the Holidays
- Dealing with Deep Sadness During the Holidays
- Shine’s BIPOC Mental Health Guide
- How to Practice Self-Care While Physical Distancing
- New State of Mind: Youth Mental Health Guide
Additional Resources
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 24/7 at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
- Crisis Text Line: 24/7 support at your fingertips, text DS to 741741
- The Trevor Project LGBTQ Hotline: 24/7 at 1-866-488-7386
- Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Hotline: 24/7 at 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
- Directory of Additional Helpline Resources from NAMI
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