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Humboldt Broncos Crash Survivor Tyler Smith Opens Up About His Mental Health

How the former junior hockey player learned that mental health is just as important as physical health.

Tyler Smith has no memory of the worst day of his life, something the 21-year-old considers “a blessing in disguise.” On April 6, 2018, Tyler and his junior hockey team, the Humboldt Broncos, were on their way to a play-off game when their bus was struck by a semi-truck. He lost 16 of his teammates, staff members, and coaches, while he and 12 others survived.

What Tyler remembers is waking up in the hospital days later with nine total body injuries, including a broken collarbone, broken shoulder blade, and nerve damage down his left arm.

“Those first three or four months were very much just dealing with my physical injuries and getting through those to eventually make my way back to play for Humboldt,” Tyler said. “I tried to stay distracted and hung out with friends and did as much as I could to kind of put my mental health on the back burner.”

Tyler did eventually return to the Broncos, along with two other survivors from the bus crash. His goals for physical recovery had been straightforward: heal up and get back on the ice. His journey towards mental recovery, on the other hand, wasn’t as clear.

“I made it back for ten games. My body felt fine, but I think my mental health was starting to catch up with me,” Tyler said. “I was coming back to a room, a town, a billet house [a host family that houses players for the season], and I was coming back to all these environments and all these places, and I wasn't seeing the faces that I wanted to see. It just wasn't the same.”

A self-described “dressing room guy,” Tyler cherishes the moments spent with teammates off the ice, building relationships and making memories together. His team knew that something was wrong when he wasn’t acting like the same person in the dressing room anymore.

“For the most part, I can be very proud of myself for the fact that I did make it back after all my injuries and everything, but we had a four-day road trip, and I remember I got off the bus, and I texted my parents and I just said, 'I'm not having fun anymore,’” Tyler said. “It was a big decision, and it was a hard decision. I actually spoke with a couple of the parents who lost their sons, and they helped me make that decision. They just kind of said to take care of yourself first.”

“Self-care, I learned, isn't selfish.”

Tyler admits that he has a tendency to put others first in his life, welcoming other people’s problems and doing his best to help them feel cared for. It was a big change for him, shifting the attention inwards and letting his own wellbeing be at the forefront.

“Obviously, with the accident, the past is something that I think about every day,” said Tyler. “It's been hard to realize just with grief at such a young age, but I can now finally realize that they are watching over and they do want me to get back to myself and the person I was before. It's been a tough transition, and I'm still learning every day.”

For Tyler, getting his mental health back on track meant seeking professional help and doing things to prioritize it daily.

“I look back on my physical injury recovery, and I was going to physiotherapy every day. I was doing stretches every day. I was doing new things every day for my physical health,” Tyler said.

“If you're going to spend all this time on your physical health and recovery, why can't you do the same for your mental health?”

Self-care can take many forms, and Tyler is still figuring out what works for him. Sometimes he works out, and other times he just tries to surround himself with friends and family. What he goes back to often is writing and speaking about his story.

“Being able to speak about my experiences and put it on paper -- I think that's a huge piece of self-care for me, expressing it and putting it out there,” Tyler said. “I didn't think at all that my story would make an impact, and to feel that and see that is very special and also beneficial to me for the self-care aspect.”

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Tyler has since given several speeches about his experiences navigating mental health and grief in the face of tragedy, and he’s even written an article about it for the story-sharing platform Unsinkable. The incredible amount of responses he’s received from people who identify with his story is what drives him to keep going.

“Everybody is fighting their own battle and everybody's fighting something that nobody knows about,” Tyler said. “I can hopefully make a difference for other people and really offer that sense of hope and share that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, no matter what you've been through.”

The battle that Tyler is facing is an ongoing one. Some days are better than others, and some will just always be challenging -- according to him, anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays especially. But now Tyler feels better equipped to handle those difficult moments when they come.

“In the month after the accident, I just didn't talk or open up at all and share, but now on the bad days, it's about being able to surround yourself with the right people, in the sense that they're going to listen when you need and they're also just going to be there when you need.”

While he doesn’t consider himself an expert, Tyler has some advice for anyone who’s struggling to take the first step towards caring for their mental health.

“You just have to start somewhere, whether you're a 40-year-old married man, or a 15-year-old high school kid,” said Tyler. “If you have physical health, then you have mental health too, and if you're struggling, you shouldn't be ashamed to open up. “

“Realize that it's very courageous and very brave to make that first step.”

Tyler has come to terms with the fact that his recovery will be a lifelong journey, and that isn’t stopping him from pursuing his goals. He’s currently a student at the Northern Alberta Institute of Technology, where he’s studying television broadcasting. Tyler admittedly likes to take things day-by-day, but he knows that he wants to continue public speaking, advocating for mental health, and sharing his stories with those who may need it.

“I feel like I'm at a place where I can definitely move forward and focus on my schooling and still play hockey and enjoy the time with my friends and family,” Tyler said. “I know that it's going to take time, and I know it's not all sunshine and rainbows, and it's not going to be a good day every day. You have to just embrace those good and bad days and know that it’s all going to work out in the end.”

Asking for help can be hard. Let your loved ones know you're there for them, and remind them to check in on their mental health through DoSomething's Mental Note: Take Time For Yourself campaign, powered my Harry's. Share a mental (health) note to help them do some personalized self-care and get connected to mental health resources for especially tough times.

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